NOTE: If the information below is too much for you to read in one sitting, then take it in slowly. Allow yourself breaks and come back to it later.
So, leaving Sugar Land was a little harder than I thought it would be. I can't believe I only lived there one year and one month. It feels like so much more time was spent in that part of Texas. But having looked back and reviewed how life has been over the past year, I realized that God orchestrated some amazing things in my life...
I met some incredible people that quickly became my family and whom I will miss with every fiber of my being:
Stephanie Click (and Piper, Avery, and Don)
My closest confidant, my kindred spirit, and beautiful mother of the two most precious kids I've ever encountered. Stephanie became like a sister to me—making it so much more pleasurable in Houston away from family and friends;
The Comm Team (Dustin, Fones, Hector, Jason, H.R., Steph, Rusty [even during the short three months he was with us])
My family away from my family. I can't imagine working with a better group of people. Even now, I miss the community we shared as Christians and co-workers. They are and forever will be some of the most creative, godly individuals I've ever met;
Adam Ellis & Will Colbert
Truly two amazing friends to me while I lived in Houston. I would have been a very lonely girl had it not been for these two;
Stephen and Amanda Miller
My spiritual mentors, hangout buddies, and great friends that counseled, encouraged, and lifted me up through some confusing times;
Pat Conner
Whether she knew it or not, she was a spiritual mentor/counselor to me and is one of the godliest ladies I know.
Nancy Curtis
Like a mother to me, she always made me feel like I was valued and loved. She prayed for me often, listened when things were rough, and showered me with love and attention when life was good;
Diann Hamilton
It didn't take long before I found out that I had a friend, encourager, mother, etc. all wrapped up in this wonderful lady. I love her with my whole heart and will miss her dearly!
Melissa Tirey
Women's Minister at Sugar Creek, she didn't just do her job as a staff member of the church because I'm a woman. We truly connected on a deeper level and I now feel as though I've made an amazing friend in her.
I got to be a part of the praise and worship team at church (thanks to Stephen Miller)--something I've always wanted to do, even if for just a short amount of time.
I gained valuable experience in communications--more specifically a crash-course in being a writer, editor, project manager, and director of communications all wrapped up in one and topped off with a not-so-confusing title--Communications Specialist. Makes sense, right?
I also learned what kind of leader I want to be in the future—very important to know.
And most importantly, I learned what it means to be completely broken and dependent upon the Lord. I think I could even probably be smashed and crumbled a little more, but before I moved to Houston, I was no where near the place where God has brought me today.
Before my move to Houston, my only satisfaction and joy came from my family and friends. I couldn't do anything apart from them. But I knew God was calling me to Houston.
For months, I fought and cried and begged and pleaded with Him to open up an amazing position in Dallas so that I could remain close to those I loved. But God said, "Kaylan, you've got to obey me. And I'm telling you to go to Sugar Land."
I remember wailing to my mom in the hotel room after my second interview. I begged her to talk to God for me and convince Him that I needed to stay back home in Dallas. But, my family and friends knew just as well as I did that I had to make this move.
After the move, I can remember reaching the most lonely state in my life. There were nights when I would lie on my living room floor and ball my eyes out asking God why He brought me to that awful place. But soon, I realized that those nights featuring the wailing and gnashing of teeth were becoming a blessing.
I found myself praising the Lord instead of screaming out my frustrations at Him. And it was in those times that I knew I'd never felt the presence of the Lord closer.I can now see why God did what He did.
If He hadn't called me to Houston, then I never would've experienced any of these people or things—even though some of the issues I faced were very tough to handle. God had to take me though that process of brokenness.
He is all-knowing and ever-present and worthy to be praised!
Last night, I went to Kairos--a mid-week worship service/Bible study for around 800+ young adults (mostly single), ages 23-35 (with a few others mixed in). It was amazing. The music was amazing. The teaching was amazing. The fellowship was amazing. Today is only day two, but I'm feeling good and I'm seeing God's abundant blessings being poured out all around me.
I'm very excited to be here. I love the people. I love the music. I love the area. I love it all. And I know that God is going to do great things in this new chapter of my life. I have a really good feeling about this place. I think I'm gonna like it here—ALOT.
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
Thursday, May 4, 2006
Canine Parenting
Here are some senseless ramblings about life with my new pup--Princess Mia Antionette Thermopolous Renaldi Christopher (aka Mia, for short):
1. This is the last time... I mean it. If my little puppy doesn't stop chewing on everything is sight, it's going to drive me insane! I know that she's teething, but I've given her chew toys, rubber bones, blah, blah, blah...and she still goes straight for my heels first. Then the carpet, the laundry, Kirby's tail...anything she can get her little mouth on.
So far, she's destroyed four pairs of my shoes: Kenneth Coles, Sam & Libby's, Payless, and some flip flops. And even after I GAVE her the pair of Payless shoes to continue destroying...she still went after my expensive duds.
2. We have been working non-stop on this potty training thing. I finally found some treats she will eat and decided to use this tactic on teaching her to go to the bathroom outside instead of in the apt. While she's become very good at understanding that she'll get a treat when she follows through with "sit," "down," and "no bite, give kisses," she still doesn't understand that pottying outside equals lots of praise and a tasty treat. Maybe she'll get it someday...
3. Most all of my friends and family know that I am a PERFECTIONIST when it comes to the cleanliness of my apt. I'm actually borderline OCD and pratically a freak about how clean I can get it and how good I can make it smell.
Well, needless to say, I walked in the other day from running errands and I got my first whif of....you guessed it...dog pee. It smelled throughout the entire house from what I could tell. I was devastated. I had to sit down, analyze the situation, and almost started crying in the process. So I got down on my hands and knees and scrubbed my carpet until my back ached. Still no good, though. My place still smells like urine. So as a result, I'm using carpet powder, Glade plug-ins, and burning candles 24/7 these days.
4. I really couldn't be happier about my little birthday present. She is the best companion and has such a sweet personality. She never meets a stranger, which is good for meeting new people when we go to shop at PetSmart or anywhere else. :) She is always at my heels and always wants to be loved. Who needs a man when you've got a dog that adores you, right?
5. And finally...I have become obsessed with my dog's hygiene. She gets a bath every other day (and yes, I do put bows in her hair), I carry baby wipes with me for unexpected mishaps, and she has her own drawer filled with a few outfits, ribbon for her hair, her brush, toys, and treats. I know...it's sad and I'm extremely ashamed of myself.
I just had to share my frustrations and joys in parenting. So, is this what being a parent to a small child is like? If so, then I'll take back what I said about being ready for a family right now. Mia is more than enough for me to handle at this point in my life. I'm starting to appreciate my singleness more and more.
I think I'll go shopping now...thank goodness I don't have to call in a babysitter for my canine daughter...
1. This is the last time... I mean it. If my little puppy doesn't stop chewing on everything is sight, it's going to drive me insane! I know that she's teething, but I've given her chew toys, rubber bones, blah, blah, blah...and she still goes straight for my heels first. Then the carpet, the laundry, Kirby's tail...anything she can get her little mouth on.
So far, she's destroyed four pairs of my shoes: Kenneth Coles, Sam & Libby's, Payless, and some flip flops. And even after I GAVE her the pair of Payless shoes to continue destroying...she still went after my expensive duds.
2. We have been working non-stop on this potty training thing. I finally found some treats she will eat and decided to use this tactic on teaching her to go to the bathroom outside instead of in the apt. While she's become very good at understanding that she'll get a treat when she follows through with "sit," "down," and "no bite, give kisses," she still doesn't understand that pottying outside equals lots of praise and a tasty treat. Maybe she'll get it someday...
3. Most all of my friends and family know that I am a PERFECTIONIST when it comes to the cleanliness of my apt. I'm actually borderline OCD and pratically a freak about how clean I can get it and how good I can make it smell.
Well, needless to say, I walked in the other day from running errands and I got my first whif of....you guessed it...dog pee. It smelled throughout the entire house from what I could tell. I was devastated. I had to sit down, analyze the situation, and almost started crying in the process. So I got down on my hands and knees and scrubbed my carpet until my back ached. Still no good, though. My place still smells like urine. So as a result, I'm using carpet powder, Glade plug-ins, and burning candles 24/7 these days.
4. I really couldn't be happier about my little birthday present. She is the best companion and has such a sweet personality. She never meets a stranger, which is good for meeting new people when we go to shop at PetSmart or anywhere else. :) She is always at my heels and always wants to be loved. Who needs a man when you've got a dog that adores you, right?
5. And finally...I have become obsessed with my dog's hygiene. She gets a bath every other day (and yes, I do put bows in her hair), I carry baby wipes with me for unexpected mishaps, and she has her own drawer filled with a few outfits, ribbon for her hair, her brush, toys, and treats. I know...it's sad and I'm extremely ashamed of myself.
I just had to share my frustrations and joys in parenting. So, is this what being a parent to a small child is like? If so, then I'll take back what I said about being ready for a family right now. Mia is more than enough for me to handle at this point in my life. I'm starting to appreciate my singleness more and more.
I think I'll go shopping now...thank goodness I don't have to call in a babysitter for my canine daughter...
Monday, March 27, 2006
Every moment...
In happy moments, PRAISE GOD.
In difficult moments, SEEK GOD.
In quiet moments, WORSHIP GOD.
In painful moments, TRUST GOD.
In every moment, THANK GOD.
Friday, March 24, 2006
Detours
I was searching through my Bible this morning and found a comic strip stuck in the pages that a very dear friend mailed to me a year ago when I was going through a difficult time. It is so profound for my life right now:
"Along our path of life we get a series of detours and we all get frustrated and impatient when we feel we have to leave the path we've chosen. But what if the real path of life is really made up of all these detours and instead of learning the real lessons of life, we miss them because we were too busy being frustrated and impatient!"
Good point...
"Along our path of life we get a series of detours and we all get frustrated and impatient when we feel we have to leave the path we've chosen. But what if the real path of life is really made up of all these detours and instead of learning the real lessons of life, we miss them because we were too busy being frustrated and impatient!"
Good point...
Thursday, February 23, 2006
El Shaddai...All-Sufficient God
This has become my daily ritual. I'm up again at 4 a.m. praying and praising. I opened my Bible and found this:
The Power of God in His Deliverance of Israel
Psalm 114
When Israel went out of Egypt,
The house of Jacob from a people of strange language,
Judah became His sanctuary,
And Israel His dominion.
The sea saw it and fled;
Jordan turned back.
The mountains skipped like rams,
The little hills like lambs.
What ails you, O sea, that you fled?
O Jordan, that you turned back?
O mountains, that you skipped like rams?
O little hills, like lambs?
Tremble, O earth, at the presence of the Lord,
At the presence of the God of Jacob,
Who turned the rock into a pool of water,
The flint into a fountain of waters.
This psalm spoke to me so clearly of God's mighty and wonderful deliverance of His people. The sidenotes in my Bible say, "The Lord delivered them from bondage in Egypt, He parted the sea as they came out of Egypt, and He parted the Jordan River when they entered the Promised Land."
Sometimes in our lives, God has to deliver us from a situation...even though it may be a painful experience. There are times when He must pluck us out of our situations in order that we might see His majesty and tremble in awe of His power and presence.
I woke up this morning and God reminded me for the 47th time, "Kaylan, I am El Shaddai...I am All-Sufficient. I am much bigger than what you give Me credit for. Look at what I've done: I've parted the waters so my people could safely cross, I've turned a rock into a pool of water, I've raised a dead man from the grave. Do you not believe I can work a miracle in your life as well?"
Genesis 17:1-2 says, "Now when Abram was ninety-nine years old, the LORD appeared to Abram and said to him, 'I am God Almighty; walk before Me, and be blameless. And I will establish My covenant between Me and you, and I will multiply you exceedingly.'"
If anyone needed to know and understand El Shaddai, it was Abram. He and Sarah were childless, yet God had promised to bless him and give him an inheritance. But instead of waiting on God, Abram took matters into his own hands with a handmaid, Hagar.
Abraham moved forward on his own and didn't wait on the Lord. He didn't fully trust that God would fulfill His promise, so he found a temporary fix until the Lord was ready to come through for him.
Some time later, God finally revealed Himself to Abram as "El Shaddai" and commanded him to walk before Him and live blamelessly. In her book, Lord, I Want To Know You, Kay Arthur says, "God [gave] Himself to Abram, and then Abram perfectly [gave] himself to God, and by God [Abram was] made fruitful."
I have been struggling with whether or not I should move forward on my own to temporarily "fix" my situation or wait on God to fulfill His promises and plan for my life. I think I've found my answer.
All of my rambling just goes to show that I am finally recognizing what God is teaching me through all of this: He has delivered me from my situation, He is still the great I AM that works miracles today just as He has since before time began, He is my All-Sufficient Protector during this time of desperation, and I am to wait on Him to fulfill His promises in my life.
So for now...I am going to claim Genesis 17:1 (among the many other verses I've claimed thus far) and recognize that He is saying to me right now just as He did thousands of years ago to Abraham, "I am God Almighty...El Shaddai. Don't forget that. Walk before Me by faith and be blameless."
The Power of God in His Deliverance of Israel
Psalm 114
When Israel went out of Egypt,
The house of Jacob from a people of strange language,
Judah became His sanctuary,
And Israel His dominion.
The sea saw it and fled;
Jordan turned back.
The mountains skipped like rams,
The little hills like lambs.
What ails you, O sea, that you fled?
O Jordan, that you turned back?
O mountains, that you skipped like rams?
O little hills, like lambs?
Tremble, O earth, at the presence of the Lord,
At the presence of the God of Jacob,
Who turned the rock into a pool of water,
The flint into a fountain of waters.
This psalm spoke to me so clearly of God's mighty and wonderful deliverance of His people. The sidenotes in my Bible say, "The Lord delivered them from bondage in Egypt, He parted the sea as they came out of Egypt, and He parted the Jordan River when they entered the Promised Land."
Sometimes in our lives, God has to deliver us from a situation...even though it may be a painful experience. There are times when He must pluck us out of our situations in order that we might see His majesty and tremble in awe of His power and presence.
I woke up this morning and God reminded me for the 47th time, "Kaylan, I am El Shaddai...I am All-Sufficient. I am much bigger than what you give Me credit for. Look at what I've done: I've parted the waters so my people could safely cross, I've turned a rock into a pool of water, I've raised a dead man from the grave. Do you not believe I can work a miracle in your life as well?"
Genesis 17:1-2 says, "Now when Abram was ninety-nine years old, the LORD appeared to Abram and said to him, 'I am God Almighty; walk before Me, and be blameless. And I will establish My covenant between Me and you, and I will multiply you exceedingly.'"
If anyone needed to know and understand El Shaddai, it was Abram. He and Sarah were childless, yet God had promised to bless him and give him an inheritance. But instead of waiting on God, Abram took matters into his own hands with a handmaid, Hagar.
Abraham moved forward on his own and didn't wait on the Lord. He didn't fully trust that God would fulfill His promise, so he found a temporary fix until the Lord was ready to come through for him.
Some time later, God finally revealed Himself to Abram as "El Shaddai" and commanded him to walk before Him and live blamelessly. In her book, Lord, I Want To Know You, Kay Arthur says, "God [gave] Himself to Abram, and then Abram perfectly [gave] himself to God, and by God [Abram was] made fruitful."
I have been struggling with whether or not I should move forward on my own to temporarily "fix" my situation or wait on God to fulfill His promises and plan for my life. I think I've found my answer.
All of my rambling just goes to show that I am finally recognizing what God is teaching me through all of this: He has delivered me from my situation, He is still the great I AM that works miracles today just as He has since before time began, He is my All-Sufficient Protector during this time of desperation, and I am to wait on Him to fulfill His promises in my life.
So for now...I am going to claim Genesis 17:1 (among the many other verses I've claimed thus far) and recognize that He is saying to me right now just as He did thousands of years ago to Abraham, "I am God Almighty...El Shaddai. Don't forget that. Walk before Me by faith and be blameless."
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Worry vs. Faith
I'll be the first to admit it. I have always lacked self-confidence and worried about things in life. These two things are obviously detrimental in a devastating and desperate situation such as now. Tonight...I opened my Bible begging God for a fresh perspective on His next move for my life and I found this in the side notes:
"Worry is always wrong, for it paralyzes active faith in your life. When you worry, you assume responsibility for things you were never intended to handle. Jesus repeatedly taught: 'Do not worry,' even about the basic essentials of life (Matt. 6:25-34).
Worry divides your mind between useful and hurtful thinking. Worrying does not change anything (Matt. 6:27) except to draw your focus away from God and His faithfulness and
righteousness to concerns about the things of life, such as possessions and material goods
(Matt. 6:31).
Worry is a choking, harmful emotion that saps your energy and elevates human strength and ingenuity above God's strength and His purposeful plan. Sources of worry include change, lack of understanding, and lack of control over your life. Worry opens the door to
worldiness, that is, preoccupation with the things of this life.
Though the children of Israel had watched God split open the Red Sea to deliver them from Egypt, they could not believe He would provide water in the desert to meet their needs. Worry is the opposite of faith, suggesting that God cannot be trusted to take care of you or to provide what you need (Phil. 4:19). Worry causes fear to crowd out faith.
Thus, in the final reckoning, 'the cowardly' are listed alongside the 'unbelieving' (Rev. 21:8). Linking worry with unbelief, Scripture gives direction for a return to full faith. The road from worry to faith begins with recongition that worry is sin and confession of lack of
faith (Ps. 139:23), continues with deliverance (Psalm 34:4), and finally ends with the assurance that absolutely nothing can separate you from the love of God who is the great I AM (Rom. 8:35; Ex. 3:14-15).
In place of anxious thoughts, you then freely offer thanksgiving from a heart established with trust in God as all sufficient (Psalm 112:7-8; Phil. 4:6-7)."
Very wise friends of mine--Tom and Brenda Bailey--who know my situation probably better than almost anyone else, just today shared with me these words spoken by Jesus to His disciples (Mark 6:11): "And whoever will not receive you nor hear you, when you depart from there, shake off the dust under your feet as a testimony against them. Assuredly, I say to you, it will be more tolerable for Sodom and Gomorrah in the day of judgment than for that city!"
Wow. "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose" (Romans 8:28). I must remember that I serve El Elyon, God most high...and El Roi, the God who sees all things. He's not been surprised by any of this. Instead, He purposed it for my good and His glory.
"Worry is always wrong, for it paralyzes active faith in your life. When you worry, you assume responsibility for things you were never intended to handle. Jesus repeatedly taught: 'Do not worry,' even about the basic essentials of life (Matt. 6:25-34).
Worry divides your mind between useful and hurtful thinking. Worrying does not change anything (Matt. 6:27) except to draw your focus away from God and His faithfulness and
righteousness to concerns about the things of life, such as possessions and material goods
(Matt. 6:31).
Worry is a choking, harmful emotion that saps your energy and elevates human strength and ingenuity above God's strength and His purposeful plan. Sources of worry include change, lack of understanding, and lack of control over your life. Worry opens the door to
worldiness, that is, preoccupation with the things of this life.
Though the children of Israel had watched God split open the Red Sea to deliver them from Egypt, they could not believe He would provide water in the desert to meet their needs. Worry is the opposite of faith, suggesting that God cannot be trusted to take care of you or to provide what you need (Phil. 4:19). Worry causes fear to crowd out faith.
Thus, in the final reckoning, 'the cowardly' are listed alongside the 'unbelieving' (Rev. 21:8). Linking worry with unbelief, Scripture gives direction for a return to full faith. The road from worry to faith begins with recongition that worry is sin and confession of lack of
faith (Ps. 139:23), continues with deliverance (Psalm 34:4), and finally ends with the assurance that absolutely nothing can separate you from the love of God who is the great I AM (Rom. 8:35; Ex. 3:14-15).
In place of anxious thoughts, you then freely offer thanksgiving from a heart established with trust in God as all sufficient (Psalm 112:7-8; Phil. 4:6-7)."
Very wise friends of mine--Tom and Brenda Bailey--who know my situation probably better than almost anyone else, just today shared with me these words spoken by Jesus to His disciples (Mark 6:11): "And whoever will not receive you nor hear you, when you depart from there, shake off the dust under your feet as a testimony against them. Assuredly, I say to you, it will be more tolerable for Sodom and Gomorrah in the day of judgment than for that city!"
Wow. "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose" (Romans 8:28). I must remember that I serve El Elyon, God most high...and El Roi, the God who sees all things. He's not been surprised by any of this. Instead, He purposed it for my good and His glory.
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
The Raging Storm
Dark, scary-looking clouds riddled with doubt and fear of what was ahead rolled into my life almost a month ago. Then the thunder came shortly after, and rattled the walls of my security sending me racing for some sort of shelter.
Needless to say, I've been running around frantically for three weeks trying to take cover...somewhere, anywhere.
But today, lightning struck leaving me in complete darkness with nowhere to hide. And almost immediately, incredible winds of circumstance blew in knocking me down and stripping me of what little certainty and foundation I had managed to hold on to.
In my time of weeping and sorrow today, I began to listen to praise songs and I came across a Casting Crowns song that described my situation perfectly—"Praise You in This Storm."
After I listened to every word, I made the decision to quit running around looking for the first shelter available. Instead, I decided to just stand out in the middle of the downpour with my arms outstretched and give what I have left—my praise and myself—to the Lord.
He is bigger, more sovereign, and more holy that I could ever imagine. No one can ever mess up His plans or thwart His purposes. And I must remind myself that I am blessed with a new day each morning that I wake up to serve Him foremost and fully, and not man.
Even though these are dark days for me and the storm still rages, I'm determined to praise Him in the midst of it all.
Needless to say, I've been running around frantically for three weeks trying to take cover...somewhere, anywhere.
But today, lightning struck leaving me in complete darkness with nowhere to hide. And almost immediately, incredible winds of circumstance blew in knocking me down and stripping me of what little certainty and foundation I had managed to hold on to.
In my time of weeping and sorrow today, I began to listen to praise songs and I came across a Casting Crowns song that described my situation perfectly—"Praise You in This Storm."
After I listened to every word, I made the decision to quit running around looking for the first shelter available. Instead, I decided to just stand out in the middle of the downpour with my arms outstretched and give what I have left—my praise and myself—to the Lord.
He is bigger, more sovereign, and more holy that I could ever imagine. No one can ever mess up His plans or thwart His purposes. And I must remind myself that I am blessed with a new day each morning that I wake up to serve Him foremost and fully, and not man.
Even though these are dark days for me and the storm still rages, I'm determined to praise Him in the midst of it all.
Thursday, January 19, 2006
These are dark times...
The last few weeks I "feel" like I've been wandering around aimlessly in the dark regarding what God wants me to do next. And then there are days when I "feel" like God has just flown me out to a desert, dropped me off in the middle of it, and vanished into thin air. I have been left with no direction, no road signs, and no compass to point me in one direction or another.
Take your pick...either scenario will fit my life at this point.
But, certainly a little wiser than I was even a year ago, I now know that feelings are fickle and faith is foundation in the life of the believer. And I know that God hasn't actually left me like I am "feeling." Instead, maybe He's just waiting for me to quit asking "why" and "what for" so that He can speak.
I was doing my devotional and reading the Bible this morning and came across the story of Hagar and Abraham in Genesis 16-17: "Abram was 86-years-old when Hagar bore him Ishmael (Gen. 16:16). When Abram was 99-years-old, the Lord appeared to him and said, 'I am God Almighty; walk before me and be blameless. I will confirm my covenant between me and you and will greatly increase your numbers.' Abram fell facedown [before God]..." (Gen. 17:1-3).
Does this mean that, after the plan involving Hagar and Sarah backfired, Abraham lived in darkness for 13 years before He heard from the Lord again?
That's kind of scary to me. But I don't think that God was just mad at Abraham and therefore decided not to talk to him for a while. I think He wanted to teach Abraham some discipline. Not only that, but he wanted Abraham to quit being so self-reliant and start trusting in Him for his future.
If you've read the story, then you know that because of Sarai's and Abram's impatience, they went ahead and did their own thing in starting a family instead of waiting upon the Lord.
Let this be a lesson to us all. Do you rely on people more than God for wisdom and direction? Do you rely on self-help books or the latest psychological trends to help you figure out life? Do you trust in your friends and family more than the Lord? I hate to admit it...but, I know I do sometimes.
I want to surrender to Him. I want to be broken before Him (which is another completely scary topic for me). I want Him to know that I don't need anyone else to be satisfied in this life. I want to come to the place where I can honestly say, "There is no one else in this world for me but You, my God!"
When will I ever come to the place where my total dependence is in the Lord? After He has to discipline me and teach me a few lessons over 13 years like Abraham? It's settled then. Even now when I don't understand what's going on..."feeling" all alone and scared...I'm going to have faith that He knows and is in control.
In the meantime, I'm simply going to wait patiently on God to shine His light (according to His timing) and lead me out of this present darkness.
Take your pick...either scenario will fit my life at this point.
But, certainly a little wiser than I was even a year ago, I now know that feelings are fickle and faith is foundation in the life of the believer. And I know that God hasn't actually left me like I am "feeling." Instead, maybe He's just waiting for me to quit asking "why" and "what for" so that He can speak.
I was doing my devotional and reading the Bible this morning and came across the story of Hagar and Abraham in Genesis 16-17: "Abram was 86-years-old when Hagar bore him Ishmael (Gen. 16:16). When Abram was 99-years-old, the Lord appeared to him and said, 'I am God Almighty; walk before me and be blameless. I will confirm my covenant between me and you and will greatly increase your numbers.' Abram fell facedown [before God]..." (Gen. 17:1-3).
Does this mean that, after the plan involving Hagar and Sarah backfired, Abraham lived in darkness for 13 years before He heard from the Lord again?
That's kind of scary to me. But I don't think that God was just mad at Abraham and therefore decided not to talk to him for a while. I think He wanted to teach Abraham some discipline. Not only that, but he wanted Abraham to quit being so self-reliant and start trusting in Him for his future.
If you've read the story, then you know that because of Sarai's and Abram's impatience, they went ahead and did their own thing in starting a family instead of waiting upon the Lord.
Let this be a lesson to us all. Do you rely on people more than God for wisdom and direction? Do you rely on self-help books or the latest psychological trends to help you figure out life? Do you trust in your friends and family more than the Lord? I hate to admit it...but, I know I do sometimes.
I want to surrender to Him. I want to be broken before Him (which is another completely scary topic for me). I want Him to know that I don't need anyone else to be satisfied in this life. I want to come to the place where I can honestly say, "There is no one else in this world for me but You, my God!"
When will I ever come to the place where my total dependence is in the Lord? After He has to discipline me and teach me a few lessons over 13 years like Abraham? It's settled then. Even now when I don't understand what's going on..."feeling" all alone and scared...I'm going to have faith that He knows and is in control.
In the meantime, I'm simply going to wait patiently on God to shine His light (according to His timing) and lead me out of this present darkness.
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
You Selfish Thing
We are such selfish beings.
How often do we pray, "Lord, help me with this or that," or "Lord, quench my thirst and satisfy me, me, me!?" It's always about me...me...me in my relationship with the Lord. Is it that way with your relationship with Him?
I forget that my ultimate goal should be to please Him...in serving Him certainly, but not foremost, because then I would be putting my service to Jesus before Jesus Himself. (If that makes any sense whatsoever.)
Instead, I need to live in total devotion to Jesus alone...through not by my actions, attitudes, words, thoughts, life, so on. My relationship with Him is not to be a one-way street.
I guess it's a subconscious thing for me. I don't even realize how much I talk to the Lord about my needs and wants every day. Like they are really so much more important that the praise and devotion from me that He deserves.
Check this out:
Jesus said to the woman at the well, "Give Me a drink" (John 4:7).
Jesus speaking to the disciples: "You shall be witnesses to Me..." (Acts 1:8).
Do you see? It's all about HIM! My dilemma is all a part of my selfish, sinful human nature. I need to work on how much more can I honor, bless, and satisfy Jesus in my life, instead of the other way around.
Forgive my ramblings. I'm working these things out in my heart and head. Just thought I would share the tangled web of thoughts in my brain.
Tuesday, January 10, 2006
Psalm 3: Confidence in Troubled Times
Lord, how my foes increase!
There are many who attack me.
Many say about me,
'There is no help for [her] in God.'
...But You, Lord, are a shield around me,
my glory, and the One who lifts up my head.
I cry aloud to the Lord, and He answers me
from His holy mountain.
I lie down and sleep;
I wake again because the Lord sustains me.
I am not afraid of the thousands of people
who have taken their stand against me on every side.
Rise up, Lord! Save me, my God!
You strike all my enemies on the cheek;
You break the teeth of the wicked.
Salvation belongs to the Lord; may Your blessing be on Your people.
There are many who attack me.
Many say about me,
'There is no help for [her] in God.'
...But You, Lord, are a shield around me,
my glory, and the One who lifts up my head.
I cry aloud to the Lord, and He answers me
from His holy mountain.
I lie down and sleep;
I wake again because the Lord sustains me.
I am not afraid of the thousands of people
who have taken their stand against me on every side.
Rise up, Lord! Save me, my God!
You strike all my enemies on the cheek;
You break the teeth of the wicked.
Salvation belongs to the Lord; may Your blessing be on Your people.
Monday, January 9, 2006
Hi ho! Hi ho...
Isn't it funny how right when you think you're settled in a good spot on solid ground, God rips the rug right out from under you? You're sent flying through the air only to land on your back with the wind knocked out of you.
I'm feeling pretty beat down right now. Don't worry...God has provided alternatives for work and I know He's in control. I may think I walked out into the unknown, but He was waiting on the other side with the gift of provision wrapped up in a box with a pretty bow on top.
So...with all this excitement and new stuff happening, why am I not excited? Why do I just feel exhausted and worn out? Why am I not ecstatic to see what's waiting around the corner? Maybe in God's efforts to slap me into submission and shove faith in my face I'm just........well.......tired. (Or...maybe I just need a nap.)
Is it OK to be completely tired of Him testing my faith? Is it OK to want to step off the roller coaster of life and regain my balance? Is it alright to want to stop running this marathon for just a minute, take a breather, and relax on the sidelines?
I know the Bible says, "...Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, schorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God" (Hebrews 12:1-2).
So then what in the world am I going on about? I don't have a clue either.
I'm whining about feeling a little spent at the moment, yet I forget that in the midst of his ministry the Lord Jesus Christ had the rug pulled out from beneath His feet. But instead of whining about His situation, He pressed on with what God had called Him to do--He suffered through a brutal beating, was savagely nailed to a cross, and carried the shame of my sin for all to see.
Things will get better...this I know for sure. Starting now, I will fix my eyes upon the Lord, quit my whining, and thank Him for those who ran a difficult race before me with perseverance and faith. Then I'll pick up my cross again and keep running.
I'm feeling pretty beat down right now. Don't worry...God has provided alternatives for work and I know He's in control. I may think I walked out into the unknown, but He was waiting on the other side with the gift of provision wrapped up in a box with a pretty bow on top.
So...with all this excitement and new stuff happening, why am I not excited? Why do I just feel exhausted and worn out? Why am I not ecstatic to see what's waiting around the corner? Maybe in God's efforts to slap me into submission and shove faith in my face I'm just........well.......tired. (Or...maybe I just need a nap.)
Is it OK to be completely tired of Him testing my faith? Is it OK to want to step off the roller coaster of life and regain my balance? Is it alright to want to stop running this marathon for just a minute, take a breather, and relax on the sidelines?
I know the Bible says, "...Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, schorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God" (Hebrews 12:1-2).
So then what in the world am I going on about? I don't have a clue either.
I'm whining about feeling a little spent at the moment, yet I forget that in the midst of his ministry the Lord Jesus Christ had the rug pulled out from beneath His feet. But instead of whining about His situation, He pressed on with what God had called Him to do--He suffered through a brutal beating, was savagely nailed to a cross, and carried the shame of my sin for all to see.
Things will get better...this I know for sure. Starting now, I will fix my eyes upon the Lord, quit my whining, and thank Him for those who ran a difficult race before me with perseverance and faith. Then I'll pick up my cross again and keep running.
Wednesday, January 4, 2006
Untitled
It has been an incredibly crazy and almost unbelievable past two days. I'm not really sure what God is doing in my life right now. I am feeling:
I have faith in God's promises...that "all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose" (Romans 8:28). And I'm trusting the Lord with all my heart, and trying not to lean on my own understanding or figure out what to do by myself. I'm doing my best to wait and listen for His guidance. I know He'll lead me in the right direction (Proverbs 3:5-6).
- Discouraged, yet empowered.
- Fearful, yet filled with hope.
- Uncertain, yet reminded to have faith.
- Betrayed by some, yet encouraged by others.
- Very alone, yet comforted because I know He is by my side.
- Anxious, yet full of peace as I wait for the next step.
- Nervous, yet excited about what's going to happen in the days ahead.
I have faith in God's promises...that "all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose" (Romans 8:28). And I'm trusting the Lord with all my heart, and trying not to lean on my own understanding or figure out what to do by myself. I'm doing my best to wait and listen for His guidance. I know He'll lead me in the right direction (Proverbs 3:5-6).
Sunday, January 1, 2006
Lessons Learned
***Prepare yourself...this is going to be a long post.***
I am always incredibly amazed when I come upon a new year and look back over the last. I can see times when God carried me through difficulties and I couldn't even see it at the time...and there are times when He lifted me up and I neglected to praise Him for it.
This past year, God has truly taught me the meaning of faith. And while I am certainly no expert on the topic...I have never come face-to-face with it like I did this past year. There were three tests of faith in 2005 that taught me what it means to completely trust in God:
TEST OF FAITH #1
I began the year in a part-time position with my church. By God's sovereign providential hand I was "let go" because the position was no longer needed and then invited back only a few days later to a revamped position of the same sorts.
I can remember my heart and soul were completely torn as to what to do. Should I take the job that I didn't feel peace about in my heart and remain financially secure? Or should I step out into the unknown (into insecurity...or so I thought) and follow God's calling?
I sought wisdom and counsel from everyone I knew, but no one had an answer for me. Could it have been that I was not seeking guidance from the One who had all the answers? Probably.
I had one semester of seminary left in January 2005 and no other jobs lined up, but God was telling me, "Kaylan, just trust me. Have I ever left you? Have you ever gone hungry or without clothes? Have you ever lived without a roof over your head? I've got all of this under control. Just have faith in Me."
So I did. I made the biggest leap of faith on January 14, 2005 that I have ever in my entire life. I turned down the position and moved into the unknown...literally...no job, no money, no security. Shortly after, I found a profound verse in the Bible and it hit me.
"It was by faith that Abraham obeyed when God called him to leave home and go to another land that God would give him as his inheritance. He went without knowing where he was going" (Hebrews 11:8).
He wanted me to obey Him by faith, leave my comfort zone, and venture out into the unknown. When I made this decision...the most incredible rush of peace overwhelmed my soul. I couldn't have made a better decision by faith.
I am still dumbfounded by how it happened (it was truly God), but I was able to survive above and beyond what I could've ever imagined throughout the spring semester on freelance writing jobs. My God totally took care of me and this event truly changed my life. I'll never forget it.
Indeed, God knew exactly what He was doing. Now that I look back, I never would have been able to make it through writing and editing my thesis and preparing for oral exams with my thesis committee had it not been for that step of faith. This 6-month trek as a freelance writer allowed me ample time to complete my project and graduate in May with no worries.
TEST OF FAITH #2
I was still without a full-time job on graduation day from seminary and told the Lord I really desired one. But He said, "Kaylan...stop being so bossy! I know what I'm doing. When are you ever going to learn that I'm ALWAYS in control? Not just some of the time...I am the constant in your life."
So I submitted myself to prayer and seeking the Lord through His Word. Sure enough...He came through as He always does.
Just a week after graduation I was offered a full-time position with PowerPoint Ministries as the Senior Writer and Editor. Again...this was better than I ever imagined.
How could I ever doubt that God was in control going forward, right? How could I ever again believe that He would need MY help to accomplish any task that comes along? Well, it took one more test to teach me.
TEST OF FAITH #3
This last fall...with no seminary holding me back, a good job in my pocket, and it just being me and the Lord against the world...I began to feel lonlier than ever for some reason and really wanted the companionship of another.
So I specifically prayed, "God, I am ready for a husband now. The timing is perfect for me...so any day now that you want to bring him along would be great. And if you have no plans to introduce us anytime soon...at least let me know that I am still date-worthy and that you haven't left me. Give me a sign that there is still someone out there for me..."
In a desperate and foolish attempt to move on with my life because I'd received no immediate answer from God, I decided to take matters into my own hands, but it obviously didn't turn out as I expected.
I learned that:
1) HIS timing is perfect...not mine. But in the midst of my crushed hopes for a husband, He answered my prayer above and confirmed that indeed He hasn't left me and I AM still date-worthy. Praise God!
2) For me, the answer was not to rely on a computer-generated matching system to pair me up with the right fellow. Instead, God was telling me, "Just trust me, Kaylan. Please quit trying to do this yourself. Only I know what's best for you."
3) God produces blessings out of disappointments. As a result of this failed eHarmony relationship and the contacts of this guy I met, my brother now has a chance to intern with the Texas Rangers (a lifelong dream and he graduates in May). Wow!
CONCLUSION
All-in-all, I have really learned to believe in the age-old hymn, "Trust and obey for there's no other way to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey." That's all He wants from me as a believer in Him...trust, love, and obedience.
I am by no means an expert on faith...and I still struggle very much with it, but I think my faith is now stronger. If I can make these three things top priorities in my daily walk with Him, then He'll continue to work miracles in my life and bless me beyond imagination.
As I enter this new year...I certainly have a different outlook than I did last year. Not only am I able to look back over the last year's events and be excited about what God is going to do in the coming year, but I can face the days and months ahead saying, "Whatever comes my way in this year and beyond...good or bad...I will trust and obey You, for You are in control—Almighty God, Sovereign Creator, Faithful Provider, Precious Savior, Lover of my soul, the Great I AM."
==========================================
ON FAITH
"For I am not ashamed of this Good News about Christ. It is the power of God at work, saving everyone who believes--Jews first and also Gentiles. This Good News tells us how God makes us right in his sight. This is accomplished from start to finish by faith. As the Scriptures say, 'It is through faith that a righteous person has life'" (Romans 1:16-17, NLT).
"So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God" (Romans 10:17, NKJV).
"For we walk by faith, not by sight" (2 Corinthians 5:7, NKJV).
"I myself no longer live, but Christ lives in me. So I live my life in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me" (Galatians 2:20, NLT).
"So Jesus said to them, '...If you have faith as a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you'" (Matthew 17:20, NKJV).
I am always incredibly amazed when I come upon a new year and look back over the last. I can see times when God carried me through difficulties and I couldn't even see it at the time...and there are times when He lifted me up and I neglected to praise Him for it.
This past year, God has truly taught me the meaning of faith. And while I am certainly no expert on the topic...I have never come face-to-face with it like I did this past year. There were three tests of faith in 2005 that taught me what it means to completely trust in God:
TEST OF FAITH #1
I began the year in a part-time position with my church. By God's sovereign providential hand I was "let go" because the position was no longer needed and then invited back only a few days later to a revamped position of the same sorts.
I can remember my heart and soul were completely torn as to what to do. Should I take the job that I didn't feel peace about in my heart and remain financially secure? Or should I step out into the unknown (into insecurity...or so I thought) and follow God's calling?
I sought wisdom and counsel from everyone I knew, but no one had an answer for me. Could it have been that I was not seeking guidance from the One who had all the answers? Probably.
I had one semester of seminary left in January 2005 and no other jobs lined up, but God was telling me, "Kaylan, just trust me. Have I ever left you? Have you ever gone hungry or without clothes? Have you ever lived without a roof over your head? I've got all of this under control. Just have faith in Me."
So I did. I made the biggest leap of faith on January 14, 2005 that I have ever in my entire life. I turned down the position and moved into the unknown...literally...no job, no money, no security. Shortly after, I found a profound verse in the Bible and it hit me.
"It was by faith that Abraham obeyed when God called him to leave home and go to another land that God would give him as his inheritance. He went without knowing where he was going" (Hebrews 11:8).
He wanted me to obey Him by faith, leave my comfort zone, and venture out into the unknown. When I made this decision...the most incredible rush of peace overwhelmed my soul. I couldn't have made a better decision by faith.
I am still dumbfounded by how it happened (it was truly God), but I was able to survive above and beyond what I could've ever imagined throughout the spring semester on freelance writing jobs. My God totally took care of me and this event truly changed my life. I'll never forget it.
Indeed, God knew exactly what He was doing. Now that I look back, I never would have been able to make it through writing and editing my thesis and preparing for oral exams with my thesis committee had it not been for that step of faith. This 6-month trek as a freelance writer allowed me ample time to complete my project and graduate in May with no worries.
TEST OF FAITH #2
I was still without a full-time job on graduation day from seminary and told the Lord I really desired one. But He said, "Kaylan...stop being so bossy! I know what I'm doing. When are you ever going to learn that I'm ALWAYS in control? Not just some of the time...I am the constant in your life."
So I submitted myself to prayer and seeking the Lord through His Word. Sure enough...He came through as He always does.
Just a week after graduation I was offered a full-time position with PowerPoint Ministries as the Senior Writer and Editor. Again...this was better than I ever imagined.
How could I ever doubt that God was in control going forward, right? How could I ever again believe that He would need MY help to accomplish any task that comes along? Well, it took one more test to teach me.
TEST OF FAITH #3
This last fall...with no seminary holding me back, a good job in my pocket, and it just being me and the Lord against the world...I began to feel lonlier than ever for some reason and really wanted the companionship of another.
So I specifically prayed, "God, I am ready for a husband now. The timing is perfect for me...so any day now that you want to bring him along would be great. And if you have no plans to introduce us anytime soon...at least let me know that I am still date-worthy and that you haven't left me. Give me a sign that there is still someone out there for me..."
In a desperate and foolish attempt to move on with my life because I'd received no immediate answer from God, I decided to take matters into my own hands, but it obviously didn't turn out as I expected.
I learned that:
1) HIS timing is perfect...not mine. But in the midst of my crushed hopes for a husband, He answered my prayer above and confirmed that indeed He hasn't left me and I AM still date-worthy. Praise God!
2) For me, the answer was not to rely on a computer-generated matching system to pair me up with the right fellow. Instead, God was telling me, "Just trust me, Kaylan. Please quit trying to do this yourself. Only I know what's best for you."
3) God produces blessings out of disappointments. As a result of this failed eHarmony relationship and the contacts of this guy I met, my brother now has a chance to intern with the Texas Rangers (a lifelong dream and he graduates in May). Wow!
CONCLUSION
All-in-all, I have really learned to believe in the age-old hymn, "Trust and obey for there's no other way to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey." That's all He wants from me as a believer in Him...trust, love, and obedience.
I am by no means an expert on faith...and I still struggle very much with it, but I think my faith is now stronger. If I can make these three things top priorities in my daily walk with Him, then He'll continue to work miracles in my life and bless me beyond imagination.
As I enter this new year...I certainly have a different outlook than I did last year. Not only am I able to look back over the last year's events and be excited about what God is going to do in the coming year, but I can face the days and months ahead saying, "Whatever comes my way in this year and beyond...good or bad...I will trust and obey You, for You are in control—Almighty God, Sovereign Creator, Faithful Provider, Precious Savior, Lover of my soul, the Great I AM."
==========================================
ON FAITH
"For I am not ashamed of this Good News about Christ. It is the power of God at work, saving everyone who believes--Jews first and also Gentiles. This Good News tells us how God makes us right in his sight. This is accomplished from start to finish by faith. As the Scriptures say, 'It is through faith that a righteous person has life'" (Romans 1:16-17, NLT).
"So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God" (Romans 10:17, NKJV).
"For we walk by faith, not by sight" (2 Corinthians 5:7, NKJV).
"I myself no longer live, but Christ lives in me. So I live my life in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me" (Galatians 2:20, NLT).
"So Jesus said to them, '...If you have faith as a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you'" (Matthew 17:20, NKJV).
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
Christmastime
Merry Christmas!
I know it's a little early...but I just can't help myself. If you were to walk into my apartment right now...you'd think Christmas stopped by and threw up all over my living room.
I'm glad I live by myself because if I had a roommate or significant other...they would certainly be exhausted by the constant repeat of Christmas carols that ring throughout my place every evening. And when it gets even a fragment below 40 degrees...I'm hauling in wood to start a fire in the fireplace.
Ahhhhhh....it sure is beginning to look a lot like Christmas...well, you wouldn't be able to tell by the warm Texas weather, but in every other way...Christmas has made an entrance and it's finally here! Praise the Lord...I got a Christmas "blessing" at work today (very much needed)! Yea!!! And I'm going to do some more shopping today for gifts to pass out to the people I love.
It's so hard to sit here at this computer and actually get any work done. I'm like a little kid...anxious and fidgety. I'm so thankful for my family, my friends, my job, and my health during this time of year.
Although, I can't help but think about those families who have suffered hardship this year and can't even afford a tree...much less a gift to put under a tree if they had one. God bless 'em...
How many of you actually give to people in need during during this time of year? I know I don't and I need to. Maybe it's high time that I head down to Downtown Dallas and give to those who are in need...better yet, those who don't even have a home to enjoy this Christmas season. I think I'll check into that...
Merry Christmas!!!
I know it's a little early...but I just can't help myself. If you were to walk into my apartment right now...you'd think Christmas stopped by and threw up all over my living room.
I'm glad I live by myself because if I had a roommate or significant other...they would certainly be exhausted by the constant repeat of Christmas carols that ring throughout my place every evening. And when it gets even a fragment below 40 degrees...I'm hauling in wood to start a fire in the fireplace.
Ahhhhhh....it sure is beginning to look a lot like Christmas...well, you wouldn't be able to tell by the warm Texas weather, but in every other way...Christmas has made an entrance and it's finally here! Praise the Lord...I got a Christmas "blessing" at work today (very much needed)! Yea!!! And I'm going to do some more shopping today for gifts to pass out to the people I love.
It's so hard to sit here at this computer and actually get any work done. I'm like a little kid...anxious and fidgety. I'm so thankful for my family, my friends, my job, and my health during this time of year.
Although, I can't help but think about those families who have suffered hardship this year and can't even afford a tree...much less a gift to put under a tree if they had one. God bless 'em...
How many of you actually give to people in need during during this time of year? I know I don't and I need to. Maybe it's high time that I head down to Downtown Dallas and give to those who are in need...better yet, those who don't even have a home to enjoy this Christmas season. I think I'll check into that...
Merry Christmas!!!
Tuesday, December 6, 2005
Joseph, Mary, & Jesus
Each year that passes, God teaches me something new about the real reason for this season. I try to visualize the night when Christ was born and the events leading up to it.
Joseph, an ordinary man, must have been devastated to find out his beloved was pregnant with child and it wasn't his (sounds like an episode of Jerry Springer, right?)! Just as this happens today, it happened over 2000 years ago.
Instead of shaming her in public, though, Joseph determined to quietly hide her away to keep her from public disgrace. Whatta man! But when the angel of the Lord spoke to him in a dream and commanded that he take Mary as his wife anyway--he obeyed--period. He was truly a comman man...but certainly a righteous man of God.
Mary, probably just a teenager, must have been scared to death and confused when the angel of the Lord told her she would conceive of the Holy Spirit. And she would be carrying the Messiah at that! What a responsibility!
I know if I were in her position, my first reaction would be, "Lord, I can't do that for You. It's just too much. I'm engaged to a wonderful man and I just want to have a normal life! Why don't you pick someone else?"
But Mary praised the Lord and obeyed without hesitation in the midst of her confusion. There is so much to learn from her love for the Lord--devotion, worship, obedience, faith, etc.
I am AMAZED at the faith of these two people. Imagine it...giving birth and raising the Savior of the entire world...and trying to be a good parent to God Himself!!! That'll blow your mind for sure.
And then Jesus--who came to earth as 100% man and 100% God. Imagine knowing him as he grew up. I wonder what kind of kid he was.
Was he funny? Did he throw temper tantrums? Did Mary have to deal with the "terrible twos?" Did he actually whine when he didn't get his way? Was he nice to his brothers and sisters? Did he talk back to his mom and dad? Did he have a horrible attitude during his teenage years like most?
It is still unfathomable to me sometimes to think that God came to earth to live among us--among sinners! He lived a perfect, flawless life only to be beaten beyond belief for being the King of kings and Lord of lords, then crucified on a cross to suffer and die for us, and finally buried only to raise from the dead three days later so that we may have forgiveness, salvation, and eternal life. Wow!
All of this may cause one to doubt if it really happened as Scripture says. It seems so supernatural, right? But I truly believe every word of it.
My perspective of Christmas has changed so much since I was a kid. It is no longer about the presents, lights, decorations, and carols (though I love all those things very much). It is first about the worship and praise of Jesus the Christ, our Lord and Savior. To God be the glory!
Joseph, an ordinary man, must have been devastated to find out his beloved was pregnant with child and it wasn't his (sounds like an episode of Jerry Springer, right?)! Just as this happens today, it happened over 2000 years ago.
Instead of shaming her in public, though, Joseph determined to quietly hide her away to keep her from public disgrace. Whatta man! But when the angel of the Lord spoke to him in a dream and commanded that he take Mary as his wife anyway--he obeyed--period. He was truly a comman man...but certainly a righteous man of God.
Mary, probably just a teenager, must have been scared to death and confused when the angel of the Lord told her she would conceive of the Holy Spirit. And she would be carrying the Messiah at that! What a responsibility!
I know if I were in her position, my first reaction would be, "Lord, I can't do that for You. It's just too much. I'm engaged to a wonderful man and I just want to have a normal life! Why don't you pick someone else?"
But Mary praised the Lord and obeyed without hesitation in the midst of her confusion. There is so much to learn from her love for the Lord--devotion, worship, obedience, faith, etc.
I am AMAZED at the faith of these two people. Imagine it...giving birth and raising the Savior of the entire world...and trying to be a good parent to God Himself!!! That'll blow your mind for sure.
And then Jesus--who came to earth as 100% man and 100% God. Imagine knowing him as he grew up. I wonder what kind of kid he was.
Was he funny? Did he throw temper tantrums? Did Mary have to deal with the "terrible twos?" Did he actually whine when he didn't get his way? Was he nice to his brothers and sisters? Did he talk back to his mom and dad? Did he have a horrible attitude during his teenage years like most?
It is still unfathomable to me sometimes to think that God came to earth to live among us--among sinners! He lived a perfect, flawless life only to be beaten beyond belief for being the King of kings and Lord of lords, then crucified on a cross to suffer and die for us, and finally buried only to raise from the dead three days later so that we may have forgiveness, salvation, and eternal life. Wow!
All of this may cause one to doubt if it really happened as Scripture says. It seems so supernatural, right? But I truly believe every word of it.
My perspective of Christmas has changed so much since I was a kid. It is no longer about the presents, lights, decorations, and carols (though I love all those things very much). It is first about the worship and praise of Jesus the Christ, our Lord and Savior. To God be the glory!
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