Monday, January 9, 2006

Hi ho! Hi ho...

Isn't it funny how right when you think you're settled in a good spot on solid ground, God rips the rug right out from under you? You're sent flying through the air only to land on your back with the wind knocked out of you.

I'm feeling pretty beat down right now. Don't worry...God has provided alternatives for work and I know He's in control. I may think I walked out into the unknown, but He was waiting on the other side with the gift of provision wrapped up in a box with a pretty bow on top.

So...with all this excitement and new stuff happening, why am I not excited? Why do I just feel exhausted and worn out? Why am I not ecstatic to see what's waiting around the corner? Maybe in God's efforts to slap me into submission and shove faith in my face I'm just........well.......tired. (Or...maybe I just need a nap.)

Is it OK to be completely tired of Him testing my faith? Is it OK to want to step off the roller coaster of life and regain my balance? Is it alright to want to stop running this marathon for just a minute, take a breather, and relax on the sidelines?

I know the Bible says, "...Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, schorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God" (Hebrews 12:1-2).

So then what in the world am I going on about? I don't have a clue either.

I'm whining about feeling a little spent at the moment, yet I forget that in the midst of his ministry the Lord Jesus Christ had the rug pulled out from beneath His feet. But instead of whining about His situation, He pressed on with what God had called Him to do--He suffered through a brutal beating, was savagely nailed to a cross, and carried the shame of my sin for all to see.

Things will get better...this I know for sure. Starting now, I will fix my eyes upon the Lord, quit my whining, and thank Him for those who ran a difficult race before me with perseverance and faith. Then I'll pick up my cross again and keep running.

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